This week is boring me

The feast or famine-ness of my existence continues, as this week is just...plain...dull. It's only Wednesday, and I HAVE accomplished some notable things, but overall, after last week's blitz of activity, i'm bored. There's 2 days left in June to execute some earth-shattering projects/schemes, so I'll do my best. I don't know...I'm just wondering where the FUCK this month went? I mean, honestly, it's cliche, but I just can't fathom that it's almost July. Will the highlight of my June be finally developing and inserting into albums my 6 rolls of film? Though that IS worthy, I want more, more, more!! I need to start privately writing some lists...figure out what the fuck i'm doing with my time in retrospect. I feel like i'm constantly busy...I KNOW I am...yet The Big Things still elude me. Ugh, baby steps...Rome wasn't built in a day...all that shit...I know, I know. I WANT the Big Shit, though...and I want it NOW. I'm sick of waiting. GOD, am I sick of waiting. I keep seeing these horrific stories in the paper that yet again shove the fragility of life in my face...specifically, 2 bikers KILLED in NYC. One of them a young guy, 24, crushed by a truck on Houston Street at like 9:15am. Can you even fathom that? Killed instantly while riding his bike on a summer morning. I was staring at his picture in the Post for like 5 minutes at 3:30am last night. Why him? Why anyone? Why NOT me? Glad you're reading THIS entry, aren't you, dear reader? Summing up my current mood...a familiar theme -- life's short...you could go any minute...i'm unspeakably bored, restless, and brimming with goals...why DO we stick to patterns even when we know they're bad? I just wanna throw every single aspect of my life out the window and start fresh...which IS what i've been slowly doing. Like this blog...what if I threw out sentence structure and REALLY started rambling? Just nonsense. Crazy jibberish. Poems. My Manifesto. Nonsense like Rosie O'Donnell's blog -- "tree, I saw one...thought of my girlhood treehouse...so sad...memories of the past....linger." Hmm, I need to formulate some end of month Serious Plots. The heart of summer is just around the corner & I remain committed to making it classic. God, it is SO nice out now...I feel like i'm at the beach. Cricketts, 75 degrees, humid, nice breeze. Perfect. So, despite the depressing topics covered here, i'm actually in a most pleasant mood. Spent 2 hours in the town library this evening...a converted mansion...lovely, relaxing, and informative. Amy Sedaris is on Craig Ferguson now...talk about perfect. I could watch her 24-7. She needs her own channel. Can't forget to mention the wonderfully awkward time on THE VIEW this morning, where Star Cunty Jones wasn't there anymore, and Baba Wawa had to explain the growing "controversy" of Star's quitting/being forced out. So rare you see unscripted things on these shows...so I thank you, Star, for at least entertaining me with your public downfall. See, i'm rambling. Does anyone care? I'm still not sure who the fuck reads this...if anyone.