If I see ONE more Cute Young Couple fucking making out at the supermarket...

Honestly, asswipes, do you have ANY idea how agitating you are? There you were tonight, 6:30pm-ish, stopping before you selected your tasty ice cream (that you'll surely shovel into each other's mouths) to stare into each other's eyes and slowly come in for a kiss. Slowly, carefully, no quick peck here. Like a soap opera scene, complete with foreheads together and sweet whispered nothings. But one wasn't enough. After some brief giggling, you did it again. I couldn't fucking concentrate on which frozen Swanson $1 dinner I wanted due to your flagrantly obnoxious display. I openly stared in disgust, even talking out loud, something along the lines of "are you fucking kidding me?" I long ago gave up much discretion when it comes to public eye-rolling and cursing to myself; I pretty much do it anywhere, anytime. So FAR, no one's punched me. The irony being I'M the one who should be doing the punching. Can you REALLY not contain yourselves until you're out of ShopRite? You are NOT in your house. You are in a SUPERMARKET. You unbelievably aggravating pieces of fucking shit.

*While I'm at it, does ANYONE know how to get "a few things" (ie, Express Lane-worthy) and pay for it in CASH? Instead of holding up the line with your DESTINED to be problematic credit or debit card? Do you REALLY not have a few bucks on you? It's funny how you're about to race back to your tony brownstone...yet you can't carry a twenty? Of course, there's the other Welfare Extreme, too, that deserves equal credit card sarcasm. And please, PLEASE don't even get me started on you fucknuts who pay by check. FUCKERS, all of you!!