Doin' the Catholicism thing

Christmas Eve means MASS. Sadly, not at midnight. "Midnight" mass this year was at 9pm, and has been at varying earlier times for many years. The Catholics are intolerant of many things, but apparently not dipshit parishioners whining that TRADITIONAL Midnight Mass is too late for them. And so off to mass with the family I went...after threatening last year that it would never happen again. I genuinely made an effort to not be dismissive. Shockingly, I tolerated it all very well. The church was decorated beautifully as always, the choir sounded great, the monsignor was pretty interesting. I didn't nod off during the homily; I actually tried to make sense of it. I found myself drawn to the choir...just staring at them. Staring, you may have noted, is a favorite sport of mine. The choir was mainly made up of older women, but there were a couple young men. I found myself wondering who they WERE. How wonderful, I thought, to have such devotion to something, such interest, such FAITH. I need to commit to something I love to do like these singing young men do...that's what I sat there thinking. What FUN, I thought, to have some kind of "practice." Choir practice, soccer practice, pilates class. Something to make yourself better. This isn't coming out nearly as eloquently as it did in my head as I sat there in the pew. But it's 3:10am, and i'm pretty tired after another long day of holiday food, drink, cheer, and shopping. Yes, cheer. I've perked up a bit since yesterday. I pray the mood holds for The Big Day. I guess the big thought that SOMEhow came out of sitting through mass was how I wanted to MATTER. I want to do things that matter, that affect change, that people take notice of. I want to help people. Really, I do. And I always have. Oh, and I also really enjoyed the "sign of peace" part tonight...wishing total strangers a Merry Christmas. I like that. It angers me that people are only overflowing with peace and love on 2 or 3 days out of the year. So I thank you, Catholic mass, for an hour of contemplation, song, and community warmth. Now I MUST get to bed before Santa decides to skip my house. Gary needs THE BLING!