Shoveling snow...yet another life task at which I excel

I wish y'all could join me at my living room window, taking in the sweeping view of my street. What you'd see is house after house of inadequate shoveling prowess...and then MY sidewalk glistening like a diamond. MY pavement is completely free of snow, along with the driveway. And it's not just one pansy-ass tiny path...it's the entire sidewalk. Others have a coating of snow, or a terribly zig-zaggy pattern, or that one tiny path, or all three. That's IF the sidewalk's even shoveled yet.

It's here where I briefly go off on a tangent about WHO shovels. I'M a tenant...but I always shovel. I'm not asked to. I just do it, because I fucking live here and i'm able-bodied and why the fuck not? I loathe renters who do jackshit, expecting the landlord to treat them like royalty. You know, like my roomie, Dipshit. But I digress.

I just don't know why people can't shovel correctly. Yes, i'd rather be doing something else. But it's the Northeast in winter, and it snows, and shoveling is what you do. And you do it RIGHT. So what i'm saying is that 1) i'm competitive even about snow shoveling, 2) I TOTALLY will judge you by how well you do it...or if you DON'T do it at all, and 3) I am a great snow shoveler!